Hats Off

I really have no comment. I just wanted it to be documented for posterity that this is what Aretha Franklin wore at President Barack H. Obama's inauguration ceremony while singing "My Country, 'Tis of Thee."

And I just want my children to know that while some may disagree, I personally want to go down on the record as saying that I just don't see this as a fashion do.

That's all.

-SM

An F-ing Valuable Thing

I continue to be so proud of the leadership from my home state.

Way to go, Rod. I think they managed to catch you dropping the F bomb only 40 times on record.

-10-key princess

Slacker Blogger

So, I've been a slacker blogger (but so have the others). I do have excuses for being such an irresponsible blogger, though.

In the last month, here's what's been going on.

• We have a new President-Elect. A guy I didn't vote for. (Clearly.) I'm less than enthused.
  
• I've gotten into two car accidents. None bad enough to total the car so I can get a new one. So I've had to drive around a loaner, which is just a clever marketing plot by the dealership, I've discovered, since now I desperately *NEED* the newer, nicer, sportier, shinier car with more options.
  
• I had a mini freakout since the market fell more severely than it did in the 1920's. A mini freakout which resulted from getting in on companies that I had assumed hit record lows. But it wasn't the low. So now I'm out - a lot of g's. And I haven't even looked at my 401K. I refuse.
  
• I've been traveling a little bit. Nowhere exotic, but places like Visalia, California. Can anyone say cows?
  
• I've been toying with the idea of going to Africa next May. I've invited all of my close girlfriends to come along, and I have a firm commitment from 2. We need a group of 8 to make the trip worthwhile and get the biggest ROI. Any takers?
• I went to go see Twilight and laughed through the whole thing.
• I've (nerdily) put some time aside to make maps and strategic shopping spreadsheets for Black Friday. Yes, the annual tradition for the 10-kp sisterhood is back in full force for 2008.
  

The good news is, I get to be with family and old friends for Thanksgiving. So I have much to be grateful for. Gobble-gobble. In the meantime, enjoy this blast from the past.



-10-key princess

Classy Gifts

Now that the holidays are just around the corner, I've decided to make a list of great gift ideas that say "class" about a million times more than the standard gift card. And while keeping in mind the present recessionary state of our economy, I've done my best to look for gifts that fit any budget.

For the Gal Pal
Cameo Stationery Set from Kate's Paperie.

This gift, in addition to being classy, is only $30. Blank notes means more flexibility. And you can even monogram or emboss these note cards. Kate's Paperie was one of my most frequented shops while living in New York. But no worries - they ship as well.
Cost: $30 for a set of $25

For the Wannabe Rachael Ray
Culinary Classes in various locations from XperienceDays.com

In addition to being a great resource for that hard-to-please gift recipient, this website offers a variety of "experience" gift options, including culinary classes wherever you are. They're a bit on the pricey side, but if you can find a location that's not quite as touristy (avoid areas like Napa, Sonoma, or New York), you'll have leftover cash for the BART ride home.
Cost: $21 per hour per person ($150 for a 3 1/2 hour session for two)

For the Kids
Local Children's Museum Pass
I have several nieces and nephews, and the quest to find a gift that
a) they don't already have
b) doesn't make annoying sounds that can't be turned off
c) won't get their parents upset with me
d) isn't clutter
is always a challenge. But a year-long membership to a museum is the gift that keeps on giving. (And it forces my nieces and nephews to spend quality time with me whenever I'm around.)
Cost: depends on location, but the average is anywhere from $50-80 per year per family.

For the Demanding Man
Cufflinks in any shape, size, or form at Cufflinks.com
A man in cufflinks automatically oozes class. But men in suits can be boring. Why not help them show their personality with Republican cufflinks or a rhinestone-studded pair for the rocker?
Cost: varies, but there's a link for those starting at under $50 per pair.

For the Entertainer
Table Topics Cubes - in categories like Family Gathering, Right or Wrong, Teen, Couples, Girls Night Out, and Election 2008.
Never again will you be stuck in an uncomfortable situation. I went to a party once where I knew, like, barely one other person. But then the host busted out the Table Topics, and within minutes I 15 new best friends. I've used these in uncomfortable, stuffy executive meetings to break the ice, too.
Cost: $9 for the "to go" topics; $25 for the standard cube set.

Happy shopping!
-10-key princess

143 Days

An e-mail from a friend:

You couldn't get a job at McDonald's and become district manager after 143 days of experience.
You couldn't become chief of surgery after 143 days of experience of being a surgeon.
You couldn't get a job as a teacher and be the superintendent after 143 days of experience.
You couldn't join the military and become a colonel after a 143 days of experience.
You couldn't get a job as a reporter and become the nightly news anchor after 143 days of experience.

BUT....
From the time Barack Obama was sworn in as a United State Senator, to the time he announced he was forming a Presidential exploratory committee, he logged 143 days of experience in the Senate. That's how many days the Senate was actually in session and working. After 143 days of work experience, Obama believed he was ready to be Commander In Chief, Leader of the Free World .... 143 days.

We all have to start somewhere. The senate is a good start, but after 143 days, that's all it is - a start.

AND, strangely, a large sector of the American public is okay with this and campaigning for him. We wouldn't accept this in our own line of work, yet some are okay with this for the President of the United States of America ? Come on folks, we are not voting for the next American Idol!

-10-key princess

Vote YES on Prop 8

My issue with voting "NO" for Prop 8 has nothing to do with being outspokenly Republican, conservative, or a supporter of family values. It has nothing to do with the homosexual issue, whether people are born gay or straight, whether or not society will crumble because of gay marriage, or how I feel about the subject being taught in schools. No, my issue with it is simple. Doing so will let the California State government and the Supreme Court of California know that they can do whatever they want to do.

Checks and balances? Out.
Democracy? Overruled.
The voice of the people? Insignificant.

Attorney General Jerry Brown suggested the following as verbiage for this November's ballot:

LIMIT ON MARRIAGE. CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT. Amends the California Constitution to provide that only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California. Summary of estimate by Legislative Analyst and Director of Finance of fiscal impact on state and local government: The measure would have no fiscal effect on state or local governments. This is because there would be no change to the manner in which marriages are currently recognized by the state.

Instead, California's Secretary of State revised it to read:

ELIMINATES RIGHT OF SAME-SEX COUPLES TO MARRY. INITIATIVE CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT. Changes the California Constitution to eliminate the right of same-sex couples to marry in California. Provides that only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California. Fiscal Impact: Over next few years, potential revenue loss, mainly sales taxes, totaling in the several tens of millions of dollars, to state and local governments. In the long run, likely little fiscal impact on state and local governments.

Talk about some creative spin-doctoring.

Why start with such a strong active word like "eliminates?" Not a single ballot measure has used such blatant verbiage in the last fifty years. The way I see it, Prop 8 has nothing to do with bigotry or hatred. It has only become that way because the media, liberal Congressmen and Congresswomen, and evidently, the Secretary of State have all portrayed it as such. And surprise, surprise - the dramalama they're getting is exactly what they wanted. Congratulations on the fantastic PR job, Prop 8 opposers.

Remember, the 14 words (which are the EXACT SAME words that Californian voters approved in 2000 with Proposition 22) "Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California" are all you should be voting on. Not creative verbiage. Not what the media tells you. Not PR. Not hype. Not lawn signs. Not because you're scared that if you vote "YES," you'll be perceived as a bigot. Those are not the issues at all. Exercise your right to vote for whatever YOU believe in. Or to keep the courts in check. Or just to prove a point.

-10-key princess

". . . We Were Wrong."

"Frankly, I wish my Democratic colleagues would admit that when it comes to Fannie and Freddie we were wrong."
-Representative Arthur Davis, D-AL 9/30/2008

Watch the whole thing. It's only 10 minutes long.



-10-key princess

If You Had To . . .

Election day is less than five weeks away.

With so much commotion going on, particularly with the economy, the issues are being overshadowed by excited media analysts, SNL, he-said-she-said, glasses, and the extortion of the definition of rich.

I've half-heartedly succumbed to the notion that the POTUS is nothing more than a talking head. It's all the people who work at his/her feet who are the ones pulling the strings. While it's in our nation's best interest to elect a public official who will serve our needs and take our country in the direction we believe is correct, I've turned off the TV entirely for the next few hours to just take a good look at their general appearance. After all, a good-looking President is better than an ugly one. Look at past examples from history:

George Washington. A man with perfect curls and a great blush brush. Nice cheekbones.

Woodrow Wilson. No combover necessary! Nice jawline, nice three-piece suit. A refined gentleman.

Dwight D. Eisenhower. Just look at those baby blues. I like Ike.

John F. Kennedy. I'll be the first to admit, he was probably our best-looking President to date. Look at those perfect teeth! I wonder if he needed braces.

Ronald Reagan. There is a reason he was an actor. He was hot in his earlier days! And he even still looks distinguished here. Look at his 'kerchief. Only classy men know how to pull that off without looking like a sugadaddy.

I'm curious, now. Which of these pairs do you think look better suited for the Presidency and Vice Presidency? Please comment strictly based on looks alone. Anonymous comments are okay, but it's more fun if you tell me who you are and where you're reading from.



I'll be interested to hear your responses.

-10-key princess

PETA Strikes Again

A quote taken from a letter from PETA's EVP to Ben & Jerry's cofounders, Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield:

If Ben and Jerry's replaced the cow's milk in its ice cream with breast milk, your customers-and cows-would reap the benefits. Using cow's milk for your ice cream is a hazard to your customer's health.

The breast is best! Won't you give cows and their babies a break and our health a boost by switching from cow's milk to (human) breast milk in Ben and Jerry's ice cream?

Ew. Just, ew. Ew. Ew. Ew.

-10-key princess

Obama's Policies "Naive" per Murdoch

I was scouring Drudge report yesterday and found this article stating exactly what I was hoping somebody would say publicly.

Obama's Economic Policies are Naive

It seems like whenever I say anything remotely negative about Obama to anybody remotely liberal, they automatically retort, "Eight more years of the same! WE NEED CHANGE!" (Brainwashing, anyone?) So it's nice to see someone in the media *finally* take the McCain/Palin side.

Oh, and by the way, in the last eight years, I've graduated college (paid for, partially, by federal grants), worked a professional job making $70k a year (decent by Midwest standards), got a 4-9% raise every year for the next four years, got my MBA, and started a consulting business with small business tax shelters. My friends and family have been safe and protected within the borders of our country. So yes, thank you, Bush Administration, for the last eight years.

I certainly hope we're not headed towards the Socialist Obama America so many people are unknowingly touting.

-10-key princess

Fall 2008 Fashion

I have a friend who's a stylist, and she helps me pick out pieces every season that will work with and complement my existing wardrobe.

There's one thing I just can't get into this season: booties.

How are these supposed to be flattering? Shoes should make your feet (not to mention your ankles, calves, and legs) look streamlined. All these do is make your feet look six inches wide and your legs look 12 inches shorter than they actually are (which, for those who know me, know I don't have 12 inches to spare).

I don't know who designed these fugly shoes, or decided that these would be hot for fall. My guess? These will be on clearance racks faster than you can say "Better Off Dead."

-SM

Wall Street 2008

I have so much to say regarding the Wall Street Crisis of 2008, but I refuse to give my $0.02 until someone else posts something on this blog. Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

-10-key princess

Lame and Whiny

Ooohhhh... this irritates me.

-10-key princess

Palin for Veep

I'll have to admit, until about 5 hours ago, I had no idea who Sarah Palin was. Who, again? What's her name?

After doing a bit of research, I have to say, I'm quite pleased with the outcome of McCain's choice for Vice President. She's everything he's not. Young. Articulate. A woman. A mother of five. A true conservative.

Yes, democrats will say she's inexperienced and unqualified. Yes, they'll pull the "McCain is how old, and he chose *HER* to replace him if/when he dies?" But just look at who they chose for their candidate for Commander in Chief. Do you *really* want to pull out the experience card? Really?

He's got my vote. I'm starting to feel enthusiasm for my Grand Old Party again. Let's just hope this duo can carry it forward through November.

-10-key princess

The Odd Couple

Rudy and Mitt have been sent to Denver by the GOP to give an unbiased perspective of what's going on at the DNC.

Their theme? "A mile high and an inch deep."

Oh, I have a drrrrty mind.

-10-key princess

Backstreet's back alright

At least you'd think so if you were at my office yesterday.

"Artists in Residence," a music program my office created to get musicians collaborating with us and allowing us to license their music for commercials, brings musicians into the agency for recording sessions. And along the way, they either perform a few songs for whoever wants to come watch, take part in a Q&A, or both.

Well yesterday, the Backstreet Boys were here. Yes, those Backstreet Boys. They were scheduled to perform at 1pm in the huge conference room/meeting room on our main floor, and as much as I didn't want to go, I wanted to go. If for nothing else than to catch a glimpse of everything - the amount of people who didn't have work to do, the number of children whose parents brought them in, the amount of hair gel they use. Unfortunately, I got down there late and the room was packed. People were already spilling out into the hallway.

I managed to peek my head in and catch a glimpse of the blonde guy (I don't know his name), but I was tired of fighting the crowd. So I just stood out in the hallway with a few other friends, waiting to hear something, when BAM - "You are, my fi-ire. The one desi-ire." The crowd inside started screaming like a group of 14 year-old girls as the boy band sang "I Want it That Way." I nearly threw up.

I couldn't take it anymore. I went back up to my desk, laughing at how ridiculous it was. Or maybe I was a tad smitten. Either way, they just need to quit playing games with my heart (with my heart).

-JT

Forced Charity

One of my biggest pet peeves is when someone tells you that it's your turn to do something nice for someone else. This happens a lot in our church: when someone new moves into the area, she's assigned a friend; when someone's pregnant, a sign-up sheet goes around to babysit her other kids; when someone has a baby, a week's worth of meals are assigned out to make sure the new mom is taken care of.

Well, I got one such phone call about 42 hours ago.

A little background information on this family to whom I was asked to give forced charity. They just had their fifth baby under the age of eight. The wife is 30 and the dad is a high profile attorney at a law firm downtown. He makes a decent income and has 90 days of paid paternity leave. There is absolutely no reason he shouldn't be able to a) make dinners for his family, b) order takeout, c) fly in a grandparent to help with the cooking, or d) call Domino's.

Here's how the conversation went:

The assigner of forced charity: "Hi, SM, this is Rae. Kristy had her baby a few days ago and has asked for three weeks worth (are you kidding me?!) of meals to help with the transition. Would you be willing to take a meal over tomorrow night?"
Me: "Well, actually..."
The assigner of forced charity: "Great, thanks. I'll tell her you'll drop off the food at 5:30."

I was guilted in.

So yesterday came and went. Before I knew it, it was 5:30 and I hadn't taken anything over. I was tempted to not even go, but I knew that if I didn't, I'd feel the pending guilt for weeks. So I put together a decent meal and drove across town.

The husband (who, let me remind you, brings home lots of money and has 90 days of paid paternity leave but was, for some reason, still in his pajamas at 6:00 p.m.) answered the door with the rest of the clan not far behind. I apologized for being a little late. It's fine, he said sternly. I handed over the food.

The husband: "Do you want me to help you get the rest of the food from the car?"
Me: "Actually, this is it."
The wife: "Oh, SM. I guess you don't know what it takes to actually feed a family of seven."
Me (in my head, but so should have been out loud): "Oh, Kristy. If you have the nerve to ask for three weeks worth of meals from other people, I think you probably have the nerve to throw some chicken nuggets in the microwave for your five kids. By the way, here's a pack of condoms."

Forced charity. I love how it gives me the warm fuzzies.

-SM

That's my name. No, that's MY name.

For the purposes of this story, my name is Jebediah Smith.

Funny story. So I was in Manhattan last weekend for a wedding on my wife's side of the family. Her second cousin was marrying a man who happened to have the same last name as me. It's ethnic, from Israel, and while more common out there, let's just say that it's not as popular here.

Anyway, that's not the funny story. We knew the groom-to-be had the same last name as me. But at the rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding, the father of the groom was giving a toast. And during his toast, he thanked his three children - the groom, the groom's sister, and the groom's brother. The groom's brother's name is Jebediah. My name is Jebediah (although I go by a nickname not related to my birth name, which is a completely different story). When I heard his name, my eyes lit up - I found my name twin.

I hadn't spoken to my name double yet, but I wanted to introduce myself. And since I always try to be the funny guy, I didn't want to just go up to him, extend my hand and say, "Jebediah Smith, I'm Jebediah Smith. Nice to meet you." Lame.

So instead, I pulled out my driver's license, walked up to the other Jebediah, and showed it to him. He took it from me, looked at it carefully, looked up at me and said, "Um. That's not me." So I was like, "I know! That's me! We have the same name!" He kind of smiled, said it was nice to meet me, and handed me back my license. And that was it. Over so quickly.

Clearly, he wasn't nearly as giddy as I was. Maybe Jebediah already found his name twin elsewhere.

-JT (aka Jebediah Smith)

I Went on a Date With an Olympian

You would think it would have occurred to me a long time ago that I went out with someone who had the potential to be an Olympic athlete, but no, it didn't hit me until about 11:00 this morning.

I went to a school with a highly ranked volleyball team, so it's no coincidence that two grads and one of the coaches (that's a separate story, noted here) are involved with the US Men's Olympic Volleyball team.

Anyhow, I was at the gym, watching a bit of NBC when the USA vs. Japan game came on. Lo and behold, there was my date: Rich Lambourne.

I don't remember who arranged it or if we even had a good time. I do remember it had something to do with the fact that he spoke Japanese, and apparently the person who introduced us assumed that I did too. Slightly awkward.

I'm tempted to Facebook friend him and write on his wall. "Hey, Rich, remember me? I'm that girl you went disco skating with in Orem sometime between 1996 and 1997. How's it going? Oh, and good job blocking that spike."

-SM

Grammar Issues

I'm really picky about grammar. Like really picky. I get upset when people don't know the difference between

whose/who's
there/their/they're
to/two/too
your/you're
its/it's

It also makes me cringe to hear things like, "I could care less." (If you could care less, then please do. It wouldn't bother me that you cared more or less about whatever it is you care about, because by now I've moved on.)

So when I watch sports, this gets on my nerves. It's the word "winningest."

The winningest coach.
The winningest Michael Phelps.
The winningest team.
The winningest Chinese athlete.
The winningest basketball player.

Are we Americans that lazy that we can't say, "The coach with the most wins," or "Michael Phelps is superhuman and a freak of nature?"

Well, I did some research. To my surprise, it's in the dictionary. But let me tell you, it's in there as an "informal" word. So if it's informal, why are we reading it in headlines?

For crying out loud.

-10-key princess